The Price Isn't Right. The Wheel of Misfortune. Love Connection.
Being an intern for a primary care physician is a lot like a game show- a sick and twisted game show- but a game show nonetheless. You follow an old, white guy around, get asked questions there's no way you could possibly know the answer to, and you never know what's going to be behind the door.
Example:
I'm sitting in my black, office chair talking to the nurse and waiting for the doc. The doc comes up and looks up the patient's info on his laptop while making small talk.
"You coming?" He says while knocking on the patient's room door.
" You know it!" I said leaving behind that awesome rolly chair.
" Hi my name is Dr Andrew and this is my student intern. Would it be okay if she observed your visit
today?" Doc said to the overweight, balding, white guy uncomfortably sitting on the treatment table.
"Uhh yeah, I guess that's okay." The patient said kind of awkwardly looking at me.
I can take a hint, so I piped up saying it was okay if I wasn't there and it wasn't a big deal, but the patient insisted he was fine with it. So I sat down in a nearby chair hoping this wasn't about to get too strange.
"So what's up," the doc said, "What brings you here today?"
"Um...well, uhh, I uh...I have warts on my genitals!" he blurted out.
I was so caught off guard that the pen I had been twirling flew to the ground and I started choking on my own spit. The doctor proceeded to ask the usual sex questions without forgetting to make an awkward joke here and there while I faked professionalism. I prayed I wouldn't have to watch the physical part of the exam. No one needs to see that.
"Alright Amanda, now is when I ask you to leave and I ask you," he said looking at the patient, "to drop your drawers."
Thank the sweet baby Jesus! Amanda. Out.
When I got out, the nurse just laughed at me saying "I was going to warn you, but it wasn't as much fun that way."
No cash and prizes behind that door.
At least it wasn't as awkward as listening to a 60 year old man talk about the characteristics of his erections. Nothing perks your day up more than that.
